How to Prevent and Respond to an Emotional Meltdown
The first step in preventing an emotional meltdown is recognizing when you're feeling overburdened.
Everyone can experience an emotional meltdown in the hectic and overstimulating environment we live in if they become so overwhelmed by their stress that it dramatically impacts their conduct.
Not strictly a medical diagnosis, a "emotional collapse" is. According to Robin Stern, PhD, a licensed psychoanalyst who is also the founding and director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence in New Haven, Connecticut, "it's used in public discourse to characterize when we are overpowered emotionally, when we strike a breaking point."
A breakdown may appear to some individuals as uncontrollable sobbing. Others may perceive it as yelling or lashing out in an angry manner. And for others, it can entail panicking or escaping a challenging circumstance.
An occasional outburst is totally natural, according to Dr. Stern. Because you feel out of control, overburdened with pressures, and your life is unpredictable, you can suddenly start crying or lash out in rage. That does not imply that you have a "problem," as she puts it.
It might, however, be a sign that some of your emotional and personal needs aren't being satisfied because you're going through a difficult moment.
The good news is that a breakdown can be overcome. Additionally, you can learn how to control the pressures in your life that could lead to a meltdown in the future.
Typical Reasons for Emotional Meltdowns
The specific reasons why emotional meltdowns occur are specific to the person and the circumstance, but certain circumstances increase the likelihood of a meltdown in many, if not most, people.
These typical triggers can include, according to Kassondra Glenn, a licensed master social worker and consultant at Prosperity Haven Treatment Center in Chardon, Ohio:
Being Overtired - According to the Division of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical, getting too little sleep, especially if it happens night after night, might increase your irritability, temper, and susceptibility to stress.
Hunger - Even if you eat enough calories each day, spending too long without eating may cause your blood sugar to drop too low, which can lead to low energy, shakiness, headaches, and attention problems, according to Penn Medicine.
Being overburdened or overscheduled - Accepting too many obligations at once, or simply committing to too many social engagements, is a definite way to end up feeling overburdened.
Big Life Transitions - Events like starting or terminating a job, getting married, having a baby, graduating from college, moving to a new home, and many other common life events might leave you more emotionally susceptible.
Unresolved Relationship Issues - It is crucial to handle disagreements as they occur in intimate relationships. According to Arizona State University, letting tensions fester usually leads to more little disputes that don't indicate significant problems in and of themselves (like arguing over what movie to watch). Conflicts increase stress, not decrease it.
Consider what often precedes or triggers meltdowns if you are prone to them. Some of these might be simple to fix, like making sure you eat more frequently. Others might need more effort, like developing stronger communication skills.
When you sense an emotional meltdown coming on, how to stop it
Although you cannot prevent difficult circumstances from occurring, you may alter your response to them. When you experience acute stress in the future, such as when your face becomes hot, your hands become cold, or your breathing becomes shallow, pay attention to how you are feeling. If necessary, take action to calm yourself before responding to the situation, unless you are being asked to save someone's life.
When we're feeling any intense emotion, it's crucial to take a break. Glenn claims that because of the way our brains are currently functioning, we are unable to make logical decisions.
She adds that doing breathing exercises and grounding techniques like focusing on your feet or bringing your fingertips together will help you to relax.
Glenn prefers to practice these five steps of deep breathing:
Breathe in deeply for four seconds.
For four seconds, hold your breath.
Count to four as you exhale.
Take a four-second pause before inhaling once again.
Repetition will help you relax.
Keep in mind that taking these actions won't change a challenging circumstance or solve the issue that caused your intense emotional reaction. To deal with the situation, however, from a less emotional and more intellectual place, Glenn advises calming down before replying.
How to Get Better After an Emotional Breakdown
How do you feel following a tantrum? Do you experience shame or embarrassment for your actions or for expressing your emotions to others? Do you feel justified in letting your frustrations out or relieved that you finally let them out? Are you concerned or worried that your outburst will have negative effects?
Although the majority of people would like to quickly forget a meltdown, Stern argues it can be a teaching moment.
For instance, if you notice that you get stressed out when you try to juggle too many things at once, you can utilize that knowledge to your advantage by improving your time management skills or practicing saying "no," advises Stern.
If expressing your sentiments in public makes you feel uncomfortable, you might consider how you feel about your feelings. Why is it not acceptable for you to be upset, furious, or in need of assistance from another person? You won't be able to manage your emotions more effectively in the future if you feel ashamed of them. So, Glenn advises, be gentle to yourself.
And what if a meltdown makes you feel relieved? If you've been keeping your emotions in check, it can sometimes be stress-relieving to express them, even in the form of a meltdown. But wouldn't it be preferable to learn how to communicate your feelings before you reached the point of sobbing uncontrollably or yelling at people? According to Stern, it's not simple to express your feelings in a healthy way so that you don't hold them inside. However, it is doable.
Additionally, be aware that while you never have to apologize for your feelings, you might have to do so for your actions or the manner in which you communicated those feelings.
If your outburst included yelling at others or acting out by tossing or slamming objects in front of them, Stern advises apologizing and making a plan for how you'll handle your emotions differently in the future. If you discover that this pattern of behavior is typical of you and you're having trouble controlling it on your own, think about speaking with a therapist for assistance developing alternate coping mechanisms. Abuse, whether verbal or physical, is never an acceptable justification for experiencing an emotional breakdown.
Glenn advises, "But do be gentle to yourself." "We all experience overload occasionally, and it is not good to shame ourselves about it."
What Can Be Done to Stop Emotional Meltdowns?
The sooner you learn to stop meltdowns in their tracks, the less probable it is that you will ever have another one. But rather than risking a breakdown, why not take action to lessen the stressful situations in your life? Here are some suggestions to get you going:
Establish stress-reducing habits.
A stress-reduction strategy entails setting aside regular time for oneself to engage in enjoyable and calming activities like exercise, journaling, laughter, and meditation. The likelihood that you'll reach the point where you feel overwhelmed by stress is decreased by constantly taking action to deal with everyday stressors as they arise rather than letting them build up, according to Stern.
Be aware of your body.
Tight muscles, headaches, tiredness, and other kinds of pain and discomfort are typical physical signs of stress, according to the Cleveland Clinic. According to Stern, if you notice any of these warning signs that your body is under greater stress than usual, pay attention and take action to manage that stress in a healthy way rather than letting it build up inside of you.
Don't disregard unpleasant or strong emotions.
Brushing unpleasant emotions beneath the rug won't make them go away. According to Stern, you can "tame" a feeling once you can "identify" it. Putting your feelings into words (a process known as "affect labeling") can actually tame the way your brain reacts to upsetting things, according to research. "Identifying your feelings helps you to understand causes and consequences of unpleasant feelings and to better handle them when they do come up."
Request assistance.
According to Jenny Yip, PsyD, a psychologist with a focus on treating anxiety disorders and headquartered in Los Angeles, "enlisting family and friends for support is a tremendous buffer to any stressors." If at all feasible, ask your loved ones to assist you by taking some of the responsibilities off your already-heavy plate. Or just talk to someone who will listen to you without passing judgment about your worries.
Increase your time outdoors.
It has been demonstrated that being in a natural setting has calming effects. According to study (PDF), simply being in contact with the sights and sounds of nature—such as the wind blowing, the river running, and birds and insects making their natural noises—can reduce heart rates and cortisol levels.
Make time for recreation and enjoyment.
Everyone has to occasionally unwind by engaging in activities they enjoy, and laughing is a terrific method to relieve tension. According to the Mayo Clinic, laughing increases circulation, relaxes your muscles, and generates feel-good endorphins, all of which reduce the symptoms of stress.
Obtain qualified assistance if you require it.
According to Stern, if you're experiencing overwhelming feelings, talking to a therapist or other mental health professional might help you figure out how to feel less overwhelmed or develop a different coping mechanism. According to Dr. Yip, therapists use a variety of approaches to assist patients manage their stress, worry, and other challenging emotions.
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